OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! It wasn't projected to happen until at least the end of 2021, but it's ALREADY HAPPENED NOW!!! BOB FILUS' CORPSE has finally EXCEEDED 500 LBS!!! BOB FILUS' POST MORTEM WEIGHT IS NOW 502 LBS!! The pathologists tending to Bob Filus at the morgue are in a state of panic!!! They don't know what to do!!! Bob Filus' corpse has received 100 DOSES of the Coronavirus vaccine since it was discovered that Bob Filus had contracted the Coronavirus post-mortem!!! In face, Bob Filus' corpse is permanently hooked up to an IV drip which administers the vaccine to Bob Filus' corpse 24 HOURS PER DAY!!! Despite this, the vaccine did NOT alleviate the weight gain!!! Instead, Bob Filus's corpse continued to amass additional girth to the point that Bob Filus now weighs a QUARTER TON!! Nobody knows how this has happened!!! This is unprecedented in ALL of recorded medical history!!! *NM*

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