Scientists all over are still at a loss for an explanation as to how Bob Filus has managed to increase his obesity 26 months after his death. According to preliminary CAT scans, as well as a whole host of other radiological tests done on his cadaver immediately following his exhumation on June 29, 2019, Bob Filus reportedly gained an estimated 40 to 60 pounds of body fat since his death on June 29, 2017, precisely two years prior. Rather impressively, this is irrespective of any body mass Bib Filus might have also lost through decomposition and the formation of adipocere during the same time frame, though this presumably has not decreased Bob Filus' girth by even one ounce. Bob Filus' postmortem weight gain is an unprecedented feat in all of recorded history, which proves that Bob Filus is larger than life. Bob Filus is larger than death. Bob Filus is larger than everything. Bob Filus was a great man. Bob Filus was a big man. Bob Filus was a fat man. Bob Filus was a great, big fat man. *NM*

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